Monday, June 16, 2008

My Father Had An Art / Remembering Him in 2008/ Father's Day

As I get ready to download some of my black and white ink sketches onto this blog spot I am reminded of my father. It was Father's Day yesterday and I kept thinking that I needed to download something onto my art blog as I thought about him. He was a pro. He knew how to give a speech.

I remember in particular the late afternoon in Chicago back several years ago when my youngest brother was getting married. I being the best man had to say some words with others, too. The father of the bride was to speak, friends of the bride and groom and perhaps another person or two. It's been too long. Memories fade. What has never faded though and always been crystal-clear to me is my father's speech. Everyone else spoke but no one did it seemingly as effortlessly and as much to the point as they should have been. My father was brilliant. He said exactly what needed to be said.

I struggled with my speech. I was not happy that my brother was marrying whom he was. It just did not seem to be the right fit and for the right reasons. I anguished : what to say? I'm sure it seemed as labored as it felt giving it. The father of the bride spoke more to what his wife had done for the wedding than he ever did of the two getting married. Perhaps he too was conflicted. My father might have been, too but you could not hear it anywhere in his words. His was the only truly correct speech given that late afternoon. It struck me like a lightning rod. I was stunned! HOW DID YOU DO IT DAD ? I still don't know. It doesn't matter. What matters is that some one said the things that needed to be said and he said them beautifully. I will remember not the contents of that speech for the rest of my life ; but the flow and tenor and rightness of it.

Dad, you grew in stature in my eyes that late afternoon in big leaps and bounds. Yours is an art and one that I hope I can master in the future. Cheers to you. I love you dad and still miss you even after all these years. Your son , TONY

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